10 Things to do when you are sick and a lesbian

Hi everyone!

So Ash has been coming down with something, and now I’m pretty sure that I have it too. Either that or am I experiencing some intense allergies. Basically it feels like someone baked a loaf of bread in my head and the dough is rising and filling up my brain. I can’t really breathe, and subsequently I am struggling to function like a human being.

The following are 10 things to do when you are sick and a lesbian. I know from experience.

1. Watch all the movies. Movies I have seen in the past week:

  • Fingersmith  (5/5 stars)
  • Gray Matters (4/5)
  • I Love You Phillip Morris (5/5)
  • Prodigal Sons (4/5)

2. Read all the books. Books I have read in the past week:

  • Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit (3/5)
  • Swimming in the Monsoon Sea (5/5)

3. Watch entire seasons of television shows. For me, it was Candy Bar Girls. (3/5)

4. Screw around on YouTube. Watch all the videos:


5. Come out to your boss.(Yeah, that happened.)

6. Avoid grocery shopping. Spend twice as much money on take-out.

7. Obsess about Lady Gaga’s new video.

8. Read all the blogs. Like these:

9. Go out to lunch with a friend. Sneeze everywhere.

10. Make out with your girlfriend, so you both can suffer together.


That’s all I have for now because I can’t stay vertical long enough to really write anything without my nose running down my face. Too graphic? Too bad.

Just kidding I love you, see you tomorrow!

What do you do when you are sick?


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9 Comments on “10 Things to do when you are sick and a lesbian”

  1. Holly
    August 20, 2011 at 3:47 pm #

    Hey – I love list style posts. Very good post. Number 10 especially! There’s no getting around both halves of the couple getting ill is there!

    • August 21, 2011 at 5:56 pm #

      It’s so true. I’m definitely of the camp that when someone is sick you should love them and hug them and take care of them, versus the people who are like “Stay away, I don’t want to get sick!”

      I’m probably a crazy romantic, but I think love and hugs are integral in the getting-well process!

  2. August 22, 2011 at 1:13 am #

    lol I love your list, especially the You and I video. There is nothing better than seeing Gaga with a piano in the middle of a corn field! I hope you get well soon :)


  3. August 23, 2011 at 9:13 pm #

    Thanks for the linkage! FYI, O, Pioneers! has moved to pioneers-blog.blogspot.com. I hope you’re feeling better!

    • August 25, 2011 at 6:22 pm #

      Oops! Forgot to amend my link! Thanks for the heads up :)

  4. August 26, 2011 at 2:03 am #

    Ack, where did you find Candy Bar Girls? Or do you have special cable you watch it on? Trying to find it online, but no luck….

    • August 27, 2011 at 7:15 pm #

      I don’t want to put the link up here (I’m not sure what the legality of that is) but I will tell you that it was on tv-links.eu. Good luck in your search and enjoy!

  5. September 3, 2011 at 4:01 pm #

    This brings back memories… my girlfriend and I ended up together because she took care of me when I got really, really sick a couple of years ago.

    I got so darn bad at one point that I was all hallucinatory and delusional, and after it was all over and done she decided she couldn’t keep her feelings about me inside any longer…. like I might go and die on her without ever knowing she loved me.

    She “came out” to me soon after and surprised me with it all. Even more surprising was discovering for myself that I felt just the same about her but stupidly had never really realized it. So…. in a way, being dreadfully sick was the luckiest thing to ever happen to me…. :)


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