So Ash has been coming down with something, and now I’m pretty sure that I have it too. Either that or am I experiencing some intense allergies. Basically it feels like someone baked a loaf of bread in my head and the dough is rising and filling up my brain. I can’t really breathe, and subsequently I am struggling to function like a human being.
The following are 10 things to do when you are sick and a lesbian. I know from experience.
1. Watch all the movies. Movies I have seen in the past week:
- Fingersmith (5/5 stars)
- Gray Matters (4/5)
- I Love You Phillip Morris (5/5)
- Prodigal Sons (4/5)
2. Read all the books. Books I have read in the past week:
- Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit (3/5)
- Swimming in the Monsoon Sea (5/5)
3. Watch entire seasons of television shows. For me, it was Candy Bar Girls. (3/5)
4. Screw around on YouTube. Watch all the videos:
5. Come out to your boss.(Yeah, that happened.)
6. Avoid grocery shopping. Spend twice as much money on take-out.
7. Obsess about Lady Gaga’s new video.
8. Read all the blogs. Like these:
- everyone is gay
- fit for a femme
- i=you (Tasya van Ree)
- O, Pioneers!
- owning my truth
- Queer Fat Femme
- rebel rousHER
- sublime femme
- the beaver bunch
- the fab femme
- Femme Galaxy
- This Side of Changed
- What Wegan Did Next
9. Go out to lunch with a friend. Sneeze everywhere.
10. Make out with your girlfriend, so you both can suffer together.
That’s all I have for now because I can’t stay vertical long enough to really write anything without my nose running down my face. Too graphic? Too bad.
Just kidding I love you, see you tomorrow!
What do you do when you are sick?
- 10 Ways to Feel Sexy Every Morning
- 10 Famous Femme Lesbians on Coming Out
- What I learned from watching 4 seasons of Mad Men in about as many days